Elana is escorted through Lumie HQ by Solon, where Geary appears to have little patience for squishy Red empaths.
Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves, like locked rooms and like books that are now written in a very foreign tongue. Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer.
They say it has no memory. That’s where I want to live the rest of my life. A warm place with no memory.
Winding down for another night.
My brain has not been very nice to me for the past couple of weeks. Telltale anxieties, dull burning aches in my head among a great many other things I’ve encountered and felt for years have decided to show themselves again. I might be used to such things, regarding them at a distance as cyclical and a chemical condition of family history, but of course it doesn’t make it hurt any less. I don’t want to blame it on the environment–I’m in a much more stable circumstance than the past few years, but the coming of Winter always prompts at least a tiny bit of self-reflection.
Make no mistake, I am a very quiet player on TSW, and my activity in the game is a cycle of energy in itself–do content one day, disappear the next. Show up to some social event like an RP or a public show, refrain from any tweets and /deaf the next day. I’d say that 60% of my TSW time is solo PvE, 25% in group PvE, 10% in RP, and 5% in any highly social ‘in-game and teamspeak/ventrilo/twitch’ event.
Unlike the last couple hiatuses, I’m not disengaging from the game for a week or two or anything (although, all of my Steam friends are on Fallout 4, it’s tempting), just probably going to hold back into more solo PvE shuffling and running content with my closest friends. Some of you say hi to me on Skype, Twitter, TSWRP and other formats (even sending me hugs through the inbox at the auction house, that was amazing), and I want to say that all of it is extremely appreciated.
Do you have a song for Filth? This is my song for Filth. Also the one you might hear me play at least once whenever I stream.
XIV. RUNNING YOUR HAND OVER IT TO CALCULATE ITS DIMENSIONS YOU THINK AT FIRST IT IS STONE THEN INK OR BLACK WATER WHERE THE HAND SINKS IN THEN A BOWL OF ELSEWHERE FROM WHICH YOU PULL OUT NO HAND
Hunting for purple cats with Solon; a not-squirrel dance circle; halloween missions after several hours dungeoning with Luminar.
An eye surgery of a couple months ago means the 24 hours thing is not viable, but I like wearing the ocular implant on my character in solidarity. Luminar revealed their intended hospital of Extra Life fundraising was the very place that my sibling is currently studying, and I met another med student a couple years behind him on Teamspeak. Small world.
“Therefore, dear Sir, love your solitude and try to sing out with the pain it causes you.
For those who are near you are far away… and this shows that the space around you is beginning to grow vast…. be happy about your growth, in which of course you can’t take anyone with you, and be gentle with those who stay behind; be confident and calm in front of them and don’t torment them with your doubts and don’t frighten them with your faith or joy, which they wouldn’t be able to comprehend.
Seek out some simple and true feeling of what you have in common with them, which doesn’t necessarily have to alter when you yourself change again and again; when you see them, love life in a form that is not your own and be indulgent toward those who are growing old, who are afraid of the aloneness that you trust…. and don’t expect any understanding; but believe in a love that is being stored up for you like an inheritance, and have faith that in this love there is a strength and a blessing so large that you can travel as far as you wish without having to step outside it.”
– Rainer Maria Rilke